The Nobody Thief
by Goggalor
Summary: It is about a burglar who tries to rob The Castle That Never Was. The Thief soon learns why you should never do this... R&R!
1. Chapter 1 Intruder In The Grounds

The Nobody Thief – Chapter 1: Intruder In The Grounds

Hello! Goggalor here! Enjoy reading this story as much as I did writing it! (or your head will explode!)

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these fantastic thingies. Except the thief.

Night was upon (as always) Organization 13's castle in the World That Never Was, and a very confused burglar was struggling in the moonlight to figure out why he was in front of this massive turreted and domed structure. He looked at his watch. According to this timepiece, it was around two o'clock in the morning.

'Shouldn't give up a good opportunity.' the thief murmured to himself as he started the path that led up to the bizarre building that now stood before him. Unbeknown to the cautious man picking his way to the castle that dominated the landscape, the nobodies inside were just waking up.

You see, this poor thief hasn't realised that he had traveled to another world, so he doesn't know about big time differences. Coupled with the fact that it is always night, he is in for a nasty shock.

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Inside the castle, a Nobody by the name of Demyx was waking up softly to an alarm clock that sang,

"_Wake up Demyx rise and shine,_

_You look really good all of the time,_

_As you wake up I will sing,_

_That you already know everything!"_

Demyx loved his alarm clock; it had a little dancing dusk on the top. He smiled as he rolled out of bed.

' Good morning everyone!' He said, addressing the thousands of plushie soft toys littered around his room. Demyx put his cloak on over his "I love Bunnies" pajamas. He pulled on his boots and ran to the window to greet the morning. As he opened the latch and took a deep breath, he spotted something. It was shrouded in black, but not an organization cloak. He jumped back from the window as he realised that this entity was an intruder.

'_YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!'_

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This is my first story, so please review!

Flamers will be dealt with sharply.

I made a pun! Heh heh...


	2. Chapter 2 The Dilemma

The Nobody Thief - Chapter 2: The Dilemma

I had to force my sister into letting me write this thing. Author's note!!! Anyways…enjoy!

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'_YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!' _Screeched Demyx, recoiling in horror at the thought of an intruder in the castle. He had to find some way to stop him, but how?

_'XXXXXXXIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGGGGGGBBBBBBBBBAAAAARRRRRRRRRR!!!'_

Demyx promptly created a portal and dived through it.

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The Thief stopped dead in his tracks. He thought that he had heard a scream. Had he been discovered? He listened intently for a few heart-stopping seconds.

'Xxxxxxiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggggggggggggggggbbbbbbbbbbbbbbaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrr...!'

The thief didn't know what a _"xigbar_" was, But he hoped he would never find out. He continued up the path to the castle that he encountered in chapter 1.

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In a room in the castle, a nobody called Xigbar was quite angry. He had Demyx pinned to the wall with several salvoes and was pointing a purple gun (that launched the salvos) at Demyx's chest.

'You have three seconds to explain why my sleep was interrupted' said Xigbar gruffly.

'Well, it's a funny story. You see, I had got out of bed and was going to say hello to the new day, night, whatever, and...' Demyx stopped there because a salvo was sticking out of the wall just to the right of his head. Slowly he turned to look at it.

'It's far too early to be dealing with your crap right now. Go bother superior for a while.' Xigbar said. With that, the salvos pinning him disappeared and Xigbar put his night-capped head under the covers. Demyx waited until he heard snoring and leaped through another portal.

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The man outside, who had been responsible for Xigbar's awakening, had snaked his way up to the front of the castle. He made his way around the building.

'How on...' he surveyed the area,'where ever this is, am I supposed to get in there?'

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	3. Chapter 3 In Which Demyx Nearly Dies

The Nobody Thief

_By Goggalor_

Chapter Three - In Which Demyx is Nearly Killed

Oh!!!!!! My third chapter already! Oooooooooh! Sorry about the wait! ; 

I own Nothing. (Except the thief!)

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Demyx walked out of the portal and into Xemnas's room. He promptly created another portal to outside the door and went through it. He knocked rhythmically and then portal-ed back inside. You had to be polite about these things.

He prodded the black and silver thing snoring gently on the large desk that dominated the room.

"Um, Superior...?"

Demyx then found himself on the floor with Xemnas on his chest holding an aerial-blade to his throat.

"Whoareyou,whatisyourbusinesshereand--" He paused, opened his eyes and looked at who he had nearly killed, "Demyx, you can get up now."

"You're sitting on me, Superior."

"Oh. Ah. Sorry."

Xemnas got up, offered a hand to Demyx and said, "I was having a lovely dream about wallpapering Sora, why was this interrupted?"

The tone was polite, but it suggested anyone not responding would find themselves demoted to a Dusk, then made to attack the Keyblade-bearer.

Demyx took a deep breath.

"XEMNASCOMEQUICK!THERE'SANINTRUDERINTHEGROUNDS!PLEASEDON'TKILLME!!"

"Um..." Xemnas began but was interrupted by a giant claymore flying through the door, reducing the solid oak frame to splinters.

The wall behind Xemnas exploded shortly after.

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to throw a claymore with your teeth?" asked Saïx, walking in with a cup of coffee in each hand.

He noticed Demyx and said, "Hello, Demyx, Xemmy, sorry about that window."

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The thief had walked around the castle three times, and there _wasn't any way in!_ He huffed and sat down. He heard some unidentifiable shouting from a set of windows high on the wall above him. He stood up wearily and waited. He wouldn't mind getting being discovered now, if it meant getting inside and some toast. The thief thought he saw a figure in one of the windows, but all he saw was a shadow-like thing. The window and surrounding wall then abruptly exploded and a big, well, _thing _came rushing out of the flying bits of glass and rubble and downwards straight at him.

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Xemnas regarded the space where the wall had been in stony silence.

"Well, it opens the room somewhat," noted Demyx tentatively.

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The thief looked at the thing protruding from the ground next to his feet. It had a handle, and a shaft, and a circular thing on the end. It was spiky. Very spiky.

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Xemnas slowly turned to Demyx.

"Release the Heartless. Get out now."

Demyx ran like the gates of Hell had opened behind him.

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More on the way! R&R! 


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